U.S. Kills Al-Qaeda's Number 3 for Nine Thousandth Time
Posted by Admin on June 1, 2010
ISLAMABAD (The Borowitz Report) – The US confirmed today that it has killed al-Qaeda’s number three for the nine thousandth time, setting a new world’s record for killing the number three man in a terrorist organization.
“No matter how many times you do it, it’s always a special feeling when you nail their number three,” a U.S. military official said today. “I’m sure I’ll feel this way when we do it for the 9001st time.”
The termination of al-Qaeda’s number three sets up a power vacuum within al-Qaeda, with candidates to replace the fallen Mustafa Abu al-Yazid scrambling to remove themselves from consideration.
According to one candidate within the terror group, “The words no al-Qaeda member ever wants to hear are, ‘Congratulations – you’re our new number three.'” More here.
The Los Angeles Times says Andy Borowitz has “one of the funniest Twitter feeds around.” Follow Andy on Twitter here.
Sorry, the comment form is closed at this time.
Revolutionising Awareness 